THESE ARE VERY ABBREVIATED AND CONDENSED VERSIONS OF THE ORIGINALS, WHICH SO FAR ARE 24-BIT TRUE IMAGES (bmp originals, not jpg) @ 1024x768 PIXELS. THEY CAN BE RE-CALLIBRATED TO THE SIZE OF ANY MONITOR, AS THE ORIGINAL FORMULAE CONSIST OF HALF A PAGE OR SO OF MATH.

THE DETAIL OF THE ORIGINALS, HOWEVER, MAKE THEM IN EXCESS OF 100 MEGABYTES FOR JUST 10 SECONDS OF MOVEMENT. THE ONES ABOVE ARE A BIT EASIER ON OUR PRICY PHONE LINES ... ;-j

IF YOU WANT TO SEE THE ORIGINALS, YOU WOULD HAVE TO VISIT ME PERSONALLY. I LIVE IN NELSON MANDELA BAY, AFRICA. I DON'T TRAVEL TO THE NORTH ANYMORE, TOO MUCH CONCRETE, NOT ENOUGH ELEPHANTS AND GIRAFFES.

HOW CAN YOU NORTHERNERS LIVE WITHOUT GIRAFFES? COMPLETELY UNICIVILISED! DON'T YOU KNOW THAT YOU MUST HAVE GIRAFFES!

WHAT ABOUT WHEN GOD COMES BACK, AND HE SEES YOU HAVE EATEN ALL YOUR GIRAFFES AND ELEPHANTS AND LIONS???. YOU GREEDY MONKEYS! AND HOW CAN YOU SELL WOMEN AS WHORES, HEY? EISH! AHMADINEJAD IS RIGHT.

OUT OF ALL THE NATIONS, ONLY INDIA AND AFRICA HAVE HONOURED GOD'S GREATEST GIFTS. UMGUNGUNDLOVU! EVEN ZIMBABWE HAS ELEPHANTS, AND THEY CAN HARDLY COUNT. AND THEY ARE BETTER THAN YOU. SIES!

PASOP! WHEN GOD GETS BACK THERES GONNA BE TROUBLE! OW! HAI! WENA!

VIVA THE RENNAISSANCE OF GONDWANALAND!!
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JON BAIN, 2006 A.D. CHRIST